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Archive for July 1st, 2009

The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for” [Maureen Dowd].

Why is it some people have the confidence to courageously pursue and ask for what they want, what they think they deserve (whether or not they bring anything to the table to back it up), while other well-deserving people will meekly accept what is handed to them?

“One’s self-image is very important because if that’s in good shape, then you can do anything, or practically anything” [Sir John Gielgud], including standing up and asking for what you deserve!

There is a reason the idiom, “the squeaky wheel gets the oil” has survived for hundreds of years. We don’t always acknowledge the best results or effort; too often we reward the loudest voice or the most persistent request, whether deserving or not.

Stay with me for the brief history lesson — you’re going to like this! The word “deserve” showed up in the late 1200’s and originated from deservire to “serve well”; “to be entitled to something because of good service.” It was generalized in the next century to “be worthy of” [dictionary.com]. Translation: If you are to legitimately deserve it, you need to bring good service to the table.

Unfortunately, as a society, we have come to embrace an entitlement mentality. We have thrown around the word “deserve” and applied it to so many groups seeking some benefit or another, that it has become diluted with greed, and self-indulgence, and self-interest, often resulting in class envy. Political correctness has taught us that unless you live at one end of the spectrum or the other, you don’t deserve it.

I know many industrious, generous, honest people who are hesitant to say, “I deserve it.” The truth is they do, in fact, deserve it. They have served well, invested in others, paid it forward, burned the midnight oil, made the sacrifice, followed the rules, and acted responsibly. They deserve to come out ahead, ask for what they want, leave early, be comfortable, enjoy the good life, exude confidence, settle for more.

“If you’ll not settle for anything less than your best, you will be amazed at what you can accomplish [Vince Lombardi].

There is nothing selfish or garish or shameful by staking your claim to what rightfully belongs to you. You’ve done the work. You’ve paid the price. You’re entitled. You deserve it.

Confidence doesn’t come out of nowhere. It’s a result of something — hours and days and weeks and years of constant work and dedication” [Roger Staubach].

Have confidence. Play to win and then stake your claim. As Janis Joplin said, “Don’t compromise yourself. You are all you’ve got.”

Don’t ever settle down because “once you say you’re going to settle for second, that’s what happens to you in life” [John F. Kennedy].

Whatever you are, be a good one,

Deanna

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